Tell Me
by wicca2star11
Summary: Shinji and Kaworu love each other...they just don't know it yet. But while they are discovering their feelings for one another, a dark shadow looms closer in the horizon. Kind of AU. Romance and a bunch of other stuff. Rated for FUTURE smut.
1. The Sunset Concerto

Kaworu walked seemingly non-chalantly down the hallways of the school, backpack in hand. A few more turns and he was at his destination: Shinji's hiding place, an empty abandoned classroom far from traffic, where he would secretly play his cello. He stopped outside the door, hearing the soft sound of Shinji's music floating gracefully through. A soft smile tugged at his lips, _Shinji-kun is truly talented_, thought Kaworu to himself.

The door made no noise as he opened it, and he quietly stepped inside. Kaworu's eyes immediately went to Shinji and his breath caught in his throat. The windows had been thrown open, letting the light of the setting sun shine into the classroom. All the desks in the classroom had been pushed to one side of the room and one lone chair sat in the middle of the empty space. Shinji sat there, cello between his knees, the slim fingers of his left hand dancing nimbly up and down the fingerboard while his right hand brought the bow back and forth across the strings. He looked almost ethereal in the orange light, his head softly swaying in time to the music and the light playing with the strands of his brown hair. If Kaworu could see his face, he would see Shinji's brows furrowed slightly in a mixture of concentration and peace, eyes closed and lips parted.

"Hello, Shinji-kun." He almost chuckled as Shinji jumped, dropping his bow and letting out a startled yell.

The brown-haired boy twirled around in his chair to face the intruder only to find a smiling, gray-haired Kaworu standing at the entrance of his sanctuary. "Kaworu," his posture relaxed slightly, "W-what are you doing here?"

Kaworu let his eyes roam over Shinji's tense form; Shinji was still uncomfortable around other people. "Nothing, actually. I was just wandering the school grounds." He smiled warmly at his friend, happy when his smile was returned by a smaller, slightly uncertain one. He watched as Shinji bent to retrieve his bow from the floor. "I heard you playing, Shinji-kun, and may I say, you play beautifully." A soft chuckle escaped his lips as Shinji abruptly sat up.

"Oh, you heard?" he smiled bashfully, "It's not that great. " A slim hand went to scratch his neck in embarrassment.

Kaworu said nothing as he walked to the side of the room where all the desks and chairs were. At the corner of his ruby eyes he could see Shimji watching him curiously as he dragged a desk across the room. He stopped in front of Shinji, positioning the desk so that he wouldn't be facing Shinji directly. He didn't want to make the cellist uncomfortable. He sat down in the desk, crossing his legs at the knee and resting his head in his hand. Shinji watched the whole time. Kaworu smiled encouragingly, "Please, continue playing, Shinji-kun."

"Oh," Shinji blinked, snapping out of his daze, "Right." Kaworu thought he saw pink begin to tinge Shinji's cheeks, but it could have just as easily have been the reddish tone of the setting sun. He observed and listened silently as Shinji lifted the bow to the strings and began to play.

A sense of calm crept over the room as the low, melodious notes emerged from the wooden instrument. No Kaworu corrected himself, The music came from Shinji-kun _He _was making the music. You could tell by the way his eyes drifted shut, an unknown emotion crossing into his features, his lips slowly parting, and his entire body beginning to rock back and forth to the melody, that Shinji put his entire soul into what he played.

And as he watched, Kaworu found his thoughts wandering to other possible situations where Shinji's eyes would close, a different kind of emotion crossing his face. His lips would part for a completely other reason, and his body would move to a different kind of music. _But those kind of thoughts are inappropriate, _Kaworu chastised himself and returned his full attention to Shinji's music.

A peaceful feeling washed over Shinji as Kaworu sat there. It was different from when he played by himself, but it was still pleasant. He was playing for someone else now. He wasn't alone. Glancing up, Shinji found ruby red eyes watching him intently. A warm smile appeared appeared on Kaworu's face and Shinji's hand froze in mid-stroke. This time there was no question that his cheeks were flushed . He stood up abruptly and turned away from Kaworu to retrieve his cello case. His hands were shaking.

Kaworu frowned, "Is there something wrong, Shinji-kun?" he asked concernedly.

With a shake of his head, Shinji replied, "No, I... I just have to go back to my house now. It's starting to get dark." he explained.

Sure enough, Kaworu saw as he glanced towards the open window, the sky had begun to turn a deep purple and the breeze was becoming cooler as well. Kaworu sighed inwardly, "Then please allow me to walk you home." he offered.

Shinji blushed, but nodded.

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A/N: My first fanfic!!! Commenting will encourage me to continue. Flaming me will make me laugh (I'm a pyromaniac)


	2. A Walk, A kiss

**Yosh!! chapter two! I wish people would comment more though. Flames are happily accepted as well as constructive criticism. Hee.. I was listening to Akeboshi the whole time I was writing this chappie. Dont forget to comment!!**

* * *

They walked in silence to Shinji's house, side by side. The cello was strapped to Shinji's back after he had politely refused Kaworu's offer of carrying it for him. It had turned into a cool evening. The clouds were illuminated a bright white by the full moon and Shinji couldn't help but watch them move lazily across the night sky as he walked alongside Kaworu. 

"Do you like the night, Shinji-kun?" Kaworu asked, his shoes making a soft shuffling noise on the sidewalk.

Shinji started and turned to Kaworu. Red eyes and pale hair shone in the silvery moonlight as he smiled softly at the brown haired boy. Their hands brushed softly against each other. Shinji smiled, embarrassed "It's quiet...and there arent a lot of people to bother you... at night, I mean." he replied. A car passed them by, its tail lights receding down the street until it turned a corner and dissapeared. Shinji readjusted one of the straps on his shoulder nervously. They continued walking down the quiet street.

Kaworu turned to him, "Are you sure you don't want me to help you carry that?" he said, placing a pale hand on Shinji's shoulder, "It looks quite heavy."

A self-conscious smile appeared on shinji's face, "No, it's okay... I've been carrying it around since I was little," he murmured, his eyes downcast, "I've gotten used to the weight." The dark shadows on his face were accented by the light of a streetlamp they passed.

kaworu let his hand fall from Shinji, his smile molding into an expression of sympathy. He tucked his hands into his pockets and looked up into the sky, "A person like you should never be burdened with such a weight on your shoulders." he spoke softly, a breeze conveniently rising to mask his words.

Shinji turned to Kaworu, confusion evident on his face, "Huh? Did you say something Kaworu?"

He flashed a warm smile at Shinji, "It was nothing important." motioning ahead of him, "This is your home, right Shinji-kun?" The one house that was dark. All the other homes seemd alive; with their windows brightly lit from the inside and the sounds of people eating dinner with their family. But this house was dark.

"Yeah... this is the house I live in." he climbed the steps with Kaworu close behind him. Opening the door to the silent house, he called, "I'm home." But no one answered. Shinji turned around to face Kaworu, smiling awkwardly, "I guess nobody's inside... would you like to come in?" he asked, scratching the back of his neck. He was rewarded with a warm smile.

"I would like that very much"

He happily opened the door wider to let Kaworu pass and closed it behind them, leaving them in complete darkness.

"...It's rather dark in here, Shinji-kun."

"Oh... yeah... Um, sorry about that." He fumbled around in the dark, running his palm across the wall, _I should know where the switch is by now!_ He found it and the lights turned on, temporarily blinding Shinji. As his vision adjusted he saw Kaworu moving towards him, his hands coming up to rest on his shoulder. He felt his face start to go warm, "Um...what-"

"Let me help you take this off."

"Take what off?" _Could it be? maybe..._

"Your cello, Shinji-kun. Let me help you take it off."

"Oh... right, the cello." _Of course! Stupid Shinji, what else would Kaworu be talking about? _He shrugged off the straps of his cello case, blushing as he felt kaworu's hands brush down his arms._ Relax, Its only cause hes helping you with the straps!_

"Shinji-kun?"

He realized that he had been standing quietly, staring at the floor. "Ah, sorry... I was distracted." he smiled up at Kaworu sheepishly, "W-would you like some tea?" He asked, propping the cello case up against the wall.

Kaworu turned to the brown-haired boy, "Yes, please, that would be nice."

The kitchen was soon bright and warm with the sweet smell of jasmine. Shinji busied himself around the small room, looking for cups and teaspoons, and the ever elusive sugar. And when the tea was finally done, the appropriate tea objects arranged on the table, Shinji joined Kaworu and handed him his cup full of warm tea.

"Thank you, Shinji-kun. It smells very nice." he said, bringing the cup to his lips.

They drank their tea quietly, every now and then smiling at each other,and when Shinji noticed Kaworu watching him, he shifted in his chair nervously. He blushed softly, when ruby eyes met his brown ones, and hoped that the warmth in his face was because of the steam from his cup.

"Why are you uncomfortable around people.?"

Shinji looked up at him, surprised. "I'm not-"

"You prefer to be alone during lunch, and when you can't be alone, you hardly speak." Kaworu noticed Shinji's brow furrowing in confusion and regretted confronting the smaller boy about his insecurities, "Im sorry, Shinji-kun, I shouldn't stick my nose in your business."

"No!" Shinji protested, he looked away in embarrassment, "No...you're right. I don't like people." Suddenly the sound of the dripping faucet became loud in the following silence. His fingers turned white from the strong grip he had on the cup. He was so concentrated on watching it that he didn't notice Kaworu reaching out to him until he felt the warm hand on his own. He laughed nervously, "I must sound like some really antisocial kid."

The pale-haired boy gave Shinji his most reassuring smile, "No, you just-"

"I'm home!" The yell resonated throughout the house, accompanied by the slam of the front door and the sound of paper bags hitting the floor.

"That's Misato." Shinji murmured.

"Yes, it seems so." replied Kaworu, lifting his hand from Shinji's.

The loud dark-haired woman entered the kitchen, her arms loaded with groceries, and beer. "Hi Shinji! Oh! You have company?" she let the bags fall onto the counter, ignoring Shinji's cries of, "Watch the eggs!" She turned a bright smile towards Kaworu, "Hey Kaworu, How are you?"

HIs face turned into a charming smile, "Very well, thank you, Katsuragi-san" he chuckled inwardly at the look Shinji was giving the woman. The eggs were broken.

"Oh please, call me me Misato!" at that, Shinji's face expression turned murderous. _Shes ignoring me again!_

"Alright, Misato-san. It's getting a bit late, though and my cousin will start to worry." kaworu replied looking at Shinji. Shinji grinned in relief.

"Oh! Don't let me hold you back then!" she cried enthusiasticly, "Shinji, Why don't you walk Kaworu to the door."

"I was gonna." he muttered, as Misato dove into the groceries, mainly beer. He sighed at her cry of, "Aww! the eggs broke!!"

Kaworu brought a hand up to his face to hide his laughter.

Shinji glared at him, "What's so funny?" but then his faced softened as he saw the taller boys face as he laughed. "I guess it is kind of funny." He opened the front door for Kaworu ready, grudgingly so, to say his goodbyes.

"I hope you will let me hear you play again."

"Huh? Oh yeah, that'd be nice." He smiled up at Kaworu, "I'm practicing some more tomorrow... if you want you can come here to listen."

Red eyes shone happily in the hall-light, "Thank you. I'll make sure to come then." He leaned forward and let his lips brush against Shinji's temple, "Goodnight, Shinji-kun." he turned and descended down the front steps towards the street, leaving a shocked Shinji behind.

_He __**kissed **__me!_


	3. Play With Me a Duet

A/N: I am really so SORRY that I haven't updated my story for so long!! I'd been really busy with summer school and had been swamped with homework and now I have a part-time job and im exhausted! So don't worry, just because I don't update frequently doesn't mean I'm abandoning the story.

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_Shinji moved quietly down the long corridor. He knew he shouldn't be awake at such ungodly hours...but... he'd had that strange dream again. The one about inky darkness, the feeling of complete helplessness... light silver hair and red eyes... and a voice, that voice humming an otherworldly tune. That was how a grown-up would describe the dream, not a five year old boy, but Shinji had been raised to be able to express himself articulately. He fumbled close to wall, grasping at the smooth surface so as not to lose his way. It was dark. But that wasn't what bothered Shinji. He was not like those other children who were scared of the dark, on the contrary, to him the darkness of night was peaceful. What he didn't like was the unnatural silence of an empty house. He arrived at the door he had been looking for: his father's study. He could hear soft music drifting from inside and could see the light peeking out from under the door. He put his small hand on the doorknob, hesitating slightly, and pushed it open slowly; cautiously._

_Gendo Ikari was sitting at his desk, sifting through various papers on his desk. The radio placed on the far corner of the table letting out a soft classical melody. Shinji opened the door wider, stepping through the doorway and into the dimly lit room. He stopped in front of the desk, keeping his eyes on his feet and fidgeting slightly as Gendo paid no attention to him. Looking up at the austere man with his large blue eyes, "F-father-"_

_"You should be in bed." The man didn't turn to him as he spoke. His pen had stopped, though, and this encouraged Shinji to continue._

_"I had a bad dream." his voice quivered, but didn't falter, much to his relief. He worried away at his lower lip when Gendo resumed writing. The awkward silence was only lessened by the soft humming of the radio. "Father..." This time, the man did look up at him, but with a blank look on his face, as if trying very hard to not lose his patience. "...Please." Shinji pleaded, his voice frail._

_His father sighed, setting down his pen, "Sit down." he said, not paying attention to the relieved look on his son's face. He watched as the small boy scrambed atop the leather chair across his desk and sat down, his short legs swinging in the air. He stared at the child as he soon started fidgeting in his seat, "What's wrong?"_

_The boy gave him an anxious look, "Can...May I just stay here for a while?" he corrected himself, "I won't speak, may I ...stay?" The music on the radio changed to a more melancholy tune. Shinji didn't want to be alone... he would rather even be here, with the man who hardly spoke to him, his father. Shinji could count on him to chase his bad dreams away._

_"That's fine." Gendo replied. He picked up his pen again and resumed with the papers in front of him. Shinji curled up into the chair, resting his head on the armrest. He watched his father contentedly; the man was so focused on his work. His glasses glinted in the dim lamplight and his lips moved slowly, forming silent words as he read. Shinji sighed softly and shifted, the soft strands of his bangs brushing against his forehead. This was nice, he decided. Even if they weren't talking, Shinji was content just sitting here in this big, comfortable chair, watching his father and listening to the quiet music on the radio._

_Wait... that music on the radio! Shinji sat up abruptly, a lump forming in his throat. His father didn't look up at him, "What is it?" Shinji turned to him with shining eyes, his bottom lip quivering._

_"F-father... that music..."_

_"What about it?"_

_"That's...that's the music in my dream..."_

_Gendo looked up at him sharply, "What did you say?"_

_Shinji flinched at his father's cold tone, "That music... it was in my dream." he repeated. Shinji cursed his big mouth. Now his father was angry at him again, all because of his dumb dreams._

_Gendo regarded his son, "That song is called The Devil's Trill. It is strange that you would dream about a song like that...Tell me about your dream." He folded his hands and rested his chin on them, watching Shinji. The boy was visibly shocked. Gendo hadn't initiated a conversation with Shinji ever since Yui Ikari died. _

_"W-well... at...at first it's really dark," Shinji stuttered, "and it's quiet... and then someone starts humming that-" He could remember it, the soft darkness. It was strange, how such pitch black didn't make him feel threatened, just strange; apprehensive. Shinji felt his mind become fuzzy and his eyes start to glaze over. His father stared at him, confused, as Shinji's voice trailed away._

_Suddenly, Shinji turned to Gendo, eyes blank. Gendo stood up abruptly, a feeling of foreboding settling in his stomach. Those eyes... The boy had only had those eyes when-. He flinched when he heard the unfamiliar voice. Blank eyes burned into his own._

_"In the cold eclipse, a shadow made by the bright moon._

_The silent hollow of the dragon's heart, yearning for the darkest skies._

_Pale wolves, with bloody eyes, lost, scared. Helped by a silent flower._

_No matter the dragon's regret, those that have reached the sky will not come back._

_The wolves will not slumber. The dragon will never fly._

_The flower will grow despite the dragon's fire" _

_Ice filed Gendo's veins as Shinji's eyes turned cold, a smirk appearing on his face, "Tell me, Ikari-san, do you like music?" He reached violently across the desk, papers falling on the floor, and grasped the child's shoulder harshly. A cold laughter escaped Shinji's lips as his eyes shone with disdain at the man in front of him. Gendo shook the boy, his own voice had left him, only stopping when the laughter quieted and Shinji's face became slack and turned to him in confusion._

_"Father...?" his voice had returned to its normal subdued tone, he flinched at the tight grip his father had on his arm, "You're hurting me..."_

_Gendo let him go, slowly sitting back down in his chair and laying his head in his hands. He could feel Shinji's eyes in him, and he really didn't need it right now, he felt weak, "Go to bed, Shinji." he said hoarsely. Even his voice was weak._

_Shinji was shocked. Not since his mother was alive had Gendo called him by his name. Warmth began to bubble up inside of him as he thought of it. Maybe his father would pay more attention to him now! A happy smile appeared on his face as he retreated from his father's study, "Goodnight, Father."_

_Gendo glanced up at him, "Goodnight, Son."_

_Shinji went to sleep with a hopeful smile on his face._

_The next morning, Shinji was picked up by his new caretaker, Ritsuko Akagi. His father was nowhere to be found._

* * *

Shinji woke up to a psychotic penguin trying to peck his skin off, "Aaargh! Penpen, STOP!" he threw his pillow at the screeching bird. Attempting to stand up from his futon, he fell back down with a loud thump as he found his arms and legs hoplessly tangled in the bedsheets. He grumbled darkly as the penguin stared at him for a moment with an almost smug look on its face before waddling away. Shinji sighed, untangling himself from the mess and getting up to follow Penpen downstairs to the kitchen. 

He could almost feel his eye twitch in irritation as the penguin cried up at him expectantly the moment he entered the room; Misato had forgotten to feed the bird _again. _Now that he noticed, Misato wasn't even _here. _So, muttering darkly about irresponsible guardians and their neurotic penguins, Shinji set about preparing both of their breakfasts. Fresh fish for Penpen, and toast for himself. Even as he sat down to eat, he was half expecting Misato to come stumbling down the stairs to have her morning can of beer. But she didn't. She had probably gone to visit Dr. Akagi's grave without him.

Shaking his head to rid himself of such depressing thoughts, he agressively took a bite out of his toast. As he ate, Shinji reminded himself that Kaworu was going to come over. A smile crept onto his face, the piece of toast dangling from his lips. Kaworu was going to come watch him play.

* * *

He almost fell down the stairs in a rush when he heard the doorbell ring. _He's here!_ Shinji thought, reaching the front door. His face was flushed when he opened it to greet the silver-haired boy. Kaworu gave him an affable smile, "Good morning, Shinji-kun. I hope you don't mind, but I brought my violin with me." he said, lifting the black case. He edged into the entranceway as Shinji opened the door wider for him to pass through. 

"Oh, that's O.K. we can practice for the Christmas Contest then." Shinji replied, leading Kaworu up the stairs to his room, "About that..." he started, Kaworu helping him set up his cello, "Have you decided on what our group is going to play?" He sat down infront of Kaworu, positioning the cello between his knees. Both their chairs faced each other.

Kaworu's face seemed thoughtful for a moment before he replied, "Actually, I wanted to ask your opinion for something." he placed his violin on his lap and reached for the violin case, taking out a set of neatly folded papers. He stared at the sheets doubtfully before handing them to Shinji, "Since you play the violin, I thought you could help me with this."

Shinji read through the sheet music carefully, his eyes drinking in the notes and already hearing the music in his head. He took a deep breath. It was beautiful. Looking up at Kaworu, he saw the other boy watching him nervously. He smiled reassuringly at him, "It's really good."

"I'm glad," Kaworu smiled in relief, "It took me a whole month to write it, since I'm not very familiar with the cello."

Shinji blinked, "You composed this?"

"Yes. It's called 'Lover's Duet'."

A slight frown appeared on Shinji's face, "Oh, but shouldn't you be playing this with..." his voice trailed away as he looked at Kaworu from lowered eyes.

The red-eyed boy picked up his violin and played a note experimentally, "I wanted to perfect it before I could play it with the person I like." he stated quietly, his eyes lingering on Shinji's.

Shinji felt his chest grow heavy at Kaworu's statement_, so he already likes someone._ Forcing a smile on his face he turned to the other, "Oh, I see... so since you only play the violin you wanted to hear what the two parts sound like together before actually playing it with her, right?" he picked up the bow and positioned it at the strings.

Kaworu gave him a strange look before picking up his own instrument and placing it between his chin and shoulder, "...you...could say that," he placed the bow at the ready, "Shall we?"

The violin came first, a long, yearning sound, as if reaching out towards its partner. As if wanting it to know of its feelings for the other. Starting soft and low then escalating to a high lament for not having its feelings understood.Then the cello replied, wanting to know of the other's feeling, but unsure if they were for the cello itself. So the cello and the violin danced around each other. Both filled with doubt, wanting to show their emotions and hoping their feelings would be returned.

But then- a revelation! Both the cello and the violin realised the other's feelings for each other. The tempo increased to a euphoric allegro(1). The two instruments basking in the elation of having their love returned. The violin boldly declaring its love and the cello softly replying.

Then the tempo slowed to a soft andante(2), both instruments cherishing each minute they had with the other. The melodic ending; it finished with a soft sigh. The violin finishing with a long satisfied note and the cello continuing and then ending in a loving berceuse(3). A lovers' quiet goodnight.

Shinji dropping the bow to his side. He took a deep, quivering breath, "That was beautiful." he whispered. His heart felt like exploding from just playing the piece. How he wished he could compose a song like this for the person he liked. He looked up at Kaworu, "It's beautiful." he repeated, his face forming into a content smile. _At least I got to play it with him once._ "I'm sure the person you like will love playing this with you, Kaworu."

Kaworu's smile slowly dissapeared, replaced with a look of dissapointment, "Shinji-kun..." he searched the other's blue eyes, then sighed, "never mind. I'm glad you liked it" He stood up, setting the violin on his chair, "Have you thought of anything we could play for the Chrismas Contest, Shinji-kun?" he asked, stretching his arms out.

The brown-haired boy thought for a moment, then, remembering his dream, replied, "I was thinking, perhaps The Devil's Trill."

* * *

_(1)allegro- a musical composition performed quickly in a brisk and lively manner_

_(2)andante-a moderately slow tempo (a walking pace)_

_(3)bercreuse-a quiet song intended to lull a child to sleep_

This story is beginning to look longer than I expected it to be, and with some slightly darker undertones. At first it was intended to be a happy high-school fic... Oo . Actually, I'm basically making up this story as I go ! I've always believed that the characters make the story, and the author just writes it down for others to read. I hope everybody sticks around to find what happens to the eva people! On another note: Who wants to be my Beta? my grammar is horrendous!!!!

**Around 600 hits and nobody reviews?!! It's not that hard... see the little button down there? Move the cursor and click REVIEW. GOOD JOB!**


	4. Im Sorry!

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews guys

...Ummm. I'm SO SORRY!! I'm so swamped with homework and school and WORK that I dont have time to update Tell Me ! Forgive me, my beloved reviewers! I will be going into a LONG temporary hiatus, but FEAR NOT! I will update as soon as I can. Gomennasai!

Meanwhile you wait.. feel free to explore my deviantart. Just clickety on the homepage link in my profile.

They may not be AMAZING like some other artists, but I still try my best!


	5. The Approaching Storm

**A/N: I really have no excuse for not continuing _Tell Me…_ Like I said before, though: I'm not abandoning my precious Kaworu and Shinji. I _could _say that I've been busy with work and school, and it _is _true, but that would make me a hypocrite anyways. I hate it when authors write a really good story and then just _stop._ Now I'm doing it too! Not that this story is_really good. _Well, I'll try not to take too long with the chapters, but I'm not going to promise anything. I've also been having writers block. So please bare with me and enjoy this chapter.**

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_Kaworu could almost feel the great sleeping Dragon's breath on his skin. Stinking, moist, and hot, it almost completely consumed him. How many times had he experienced this feeling of insignificance while in the Dragon's presence? At the corner of his eyes he could see a small flower bud, glowing a soft white in the dark bleakness of the Dragon's demesne. His heart thudded painfully in his chest, "Do not see the flower. Do_ not_ see the flower!" he chanted under his breath. If the monstrous creature noticed the fragile blossom…_

_The Dragon's massive head rose, its large black eyes opening and swiveling to pin their gaze him. Kaworu felt his body stiffen and his heart almost stopped. Those cold, dead eyes watched him for a few seconds and Kaworu felt his blood freeze. The short moment stretched to what seemed like hours in Kaworu's mind until finally the immense head turned back, rising higher to gaze up at the moon. It opened a grotesque mouth, steam escaping from the gigantic orifice, and let out a blaring roar. The sound was mournful. It seemed like the monster was trying to reach the glowing disc in the sky. Cold shivers wracked Kaworu's body. Even in this heat, this all-consuming heat, all the warmth still left the silver-haired boy's body at just a glance from the massive creature. He hated it. The monster, in its crippling grief, only brought pain to those around him; Kaworu, his cousin, _Shinji…

_Crimson eyes lifted to see the flower, still standing safely, only a few feet from the Dragon's ire. _Please… don't let him see it_… A useless prayer, because the moment Kaworu started inching towards the white bloom, the Dragon's enormous head swiveled towards them. Large, lifeless eyes became steely and full of unbridled hunger. A low, rumbling growl emanated from the creature's throat; smoke billowing from its flaring nostrils, as it slowly walked towards Kaworu and the white flower._

"_No…" Kaworu whispered roughly, desperately. But it was like the breath had been stolen from him. The Dragon lumbered closer, and Kaworu could do nothing but keep himself between the hideous beast and his precious white flower. But it was so difficult! Each step the Dragon took that came closer, the less Kaworu could breathe. It felt like cold hands wrapped around his neck, tightening until he couldn't breathe _at all _But he had to stay. He had to protect the flower… He had to…_

* * *

Kaworu gasped for breath but to no avail. He couldn't breathe. His vision was blurry, and it had nothing to do with him having just woken up. Someone was choking him! He clawed frantically at the hands wrapped around his neck but they were strong, not weak from sleep like his. Spots began dancing around his vision until all that he could see was crimson. Pale skin and red eyes just like his; everything was fading around him except these. It hurt. His chest felt like it was on fire. Those pale hands trembled then tightened even more. Kaworu choked, using the last of his breath to force out his voice in one last attempt. "…Cousin… stop!" 

He barely registered the distorted sob coming from above him as he was released and oxygen flooded back into his lungs. Kaworu rose from the bed, coughing and gasping for air, his attacker thrown off of him. The room spun around him and he almost fell back down from dizziness, but he forced himself to turn towards the other. His chest tightened painfully.

She was crying. Her face was wet and shining with tears. She wrung her hands in agitation as hysterical sobs erupted from her small mouth. With sweat-slicked hair plastered against his forehead, Kaworu watched her from his futon, panting, his desperation for breath subsiding. It hurt him more seeing his cousin like this. This girl who never showed emotions, brought to tears because of…

"It was him!" she whispered shrilly. Another broken sob escaped, "It was _him_!" Red eyes just like his own, but overflowing with tears, searched his. She covered her face with her hands and cried into them, "I'm sorry!" she sobbed, "He… he…"

Kaworu pulled her into an embrace, muffling her cries of, "I'm sorry!" against his chest. He could feel her tears soak into his shirt and cursed the man who had brought all this upon him and his cousin. He stroked her pale hair until her sobs quieted down into small sniffles. Her arms had wrapped around his waist, and her legs curled up under her pajamas, just like that time when they still lived with _that man._

She pulled away from him once she stopped crying, her face once again cool and composed despite the sheen of tears coating it. Her hands came up to her face, wiping it with her sleeves and letting out one last little sniff. "I'm sorry." She whispered, "I couldn't… I couldn't keep him-" She shook her head in resignation.

"It's over." Kaworu reassured, reaching out a hand to take hers, "You did not follow through. It's over." Her fingers were clammy as she shakily gripped their hands together. Kaworu's red eyes watched her sympathetically, "Tell me." He inquired softly. When she didn't say anything, he sighed, "What did he do to you, Rei?"

His cousin shivered slightly, "He's coming back, Kaworu." She said slowly "This time he doesn't want us."

Kaworu stiffened. _Shinji…_

* * *

"Achoo!" 

"Bless You!" Misato called culled up the stairs. When she got no response, she just shrugged. it _was _late after all. Dropping her purse on the kitchen table, she retrieved a can of beer from the refrigerator. The can let out a satisfying hiss as Misato opened it. Sinking into a chair, she let out a tired moan. It had been a long day at the command center. _It wasn't like it had been busy_, she grumbled to herself. In fact, there had been nothing to do. She threw her head back, taking a long, cool gulp from the icy can, "That hits the spot!" She sighed happily.

She glanced at the clock and cursed, "Dammit!" It was almost morning and she had to go visit Kaji first thing. Downing the rest of the contents in the aluminum can, she got up, grumbling the whole way to the trash bin. "Stupid Kaji and his stupid conspiracy theories. Never lets a woman sleep!" She jumped at the sound of the telephone. It was ridiculously loud in the quiet house. She hastily picked it up, hoping that it hadn't woken Shinji, "Hello? Misato here!" she spoke into the receiver.

"_Major Katsuragi, I hope you have been working hard in my absence?"_

Her back straightened immediately at the sound of the man's voice. Her right hand almost flew up into a salute of its own accord. She cleared her throat silently, "Yes, sir. I have done all that you've asked of me, Commander Ikari."

* * *

… **Still no reviews. More than 1,000 hits and still only 7 reviews? C'mon people, I have feelings too! If you like it, tell me! I you hate it, flame me! Just say_something_. And I don't mean "something" literally! I know you can do it. Besides, if nobody keeps reviewing, I might just lose the motivation to finish this fanfic… I already feel the writer's block creeping up on me. I really don't like spending all my free time writing a story that no one likes.**


	6. Merry Christmas, Shinjikun

**A/N: Well…I'm still a little **_**disappointed**_**with the small amount of reviews I've been receiving. I **_**am**_**very grateful, however to those that have reviewed, and am only a little sad that I won't be able to respond to them individually D: Thanks guys! Now, as a special exception to my earlier statement of not continuing until I got more reviews: The Special Christmas Concert!**

* * *

The noise resounding throughout the hall was deafening, but joyous. Everyone walking through them was smiling and laughing with friends or family. Christmas decorations hung from every corner, window, ceiling and door, framing various works of art from the students of Tokyo-3 Junior High. All in all, the scene was quite festive. Now if only Kaworu could find Shinji. He walked down the hall, violin in tow, eyes roving through the scattered groups of people, looking for the brown-haired boy. Kaworu sighed after a few minutes of fruitless searching. _Of _course_ Shinji-kun wouldn't be found here_, Kaworu reminded himself, there were far too many people. He would probably be already in the auditorium rehearsing for their piece.

He smiled warmly as he passed Rei standing in front of her submission for the Christmas Art Gallery. It was a beautiful painting of two steel-gray wolves curled around a small white flower on the snow. One wolf, most likely the male from its size, was nuzzling the flower with its long muzzle, red eyes glowing brightly against the snowy background. It was a touching composition, and many people had started to gather around his cousin to admire it and its creator. Kaworu had never seen the stoic girl seem so self-conscience. He would have stopped if he hadn't noticed a flashy redhead making her way towards the bluenette. He smiled knowingly at Rei's blushing face as the loud girl stopped beside her and continued on his search for Shinji.

* * *

Asuka whistled appreciatively at the work of art in front of her before turning to Rei and shoving her shoulder playfully, "You're not so bad, Doll-face." She said, grinning widely, "But now you have to come see _me._ I'm going to be singing _Es ist ein Ros' entsprungen_!" she proudly exclaimed, "It's in German!" She put her hands on her hips expectantly, "I _won't_ take no for an answer!"

Rei's blush deepened a few shades darker as she nodded quietly at the fiery haired girl.

* * *

The auditorium was still dark except for the stage. It seemed everyone was in the entrance hall observing the paintings and sculptures. He heard a sound coming from behind the stage and went to investigate. As he thought, Shinji was there, practicing for his part in their group's performance of The Devil's Trill. Kaworu made sure to make sufficient noise as he approached the boy so as not to startle him. He was met with a shy smile.

"Why aren't you out in the hall?" Shinji asked, setting his bow down, "Everyone's out there talking to their friends."

Silver hair glinted in the spotlight from above as Kaworu sat next to Shinji, "I'd rather be here where it's nice and quiet." He replied amiably, "Besides, I enjoy your company, Shinji-kun."

The boys face flushed at Kaworu's statement, "Thank you…I like being in your company too, Kaworu." He said shyly, watching Kaworu as he methodically opened his violin case and brought out the highly polished instrument.

Red eyes glowed in happiness, "I'm glad. I would be very unhappy if you found me troublesome."

"I'd never think you were troublesome!" Shinji protested, his brows knitting together, but then relaxing as the older boy chuckled.

"I'm only teasing you, Shinji-kun. However, I still am glad that you enjoy my company." Kaworu smiled, _If only you enjoyed mine as much as I enjoy yours. _He thought. At Shinji's strange look, he decided to change the subject, "People are going to start coming into the auditorium," he sighed, "We should get to our places and wait for the others."

As if on cue, the lights overhead flashed on and dozens of teenagers with their parents started filing in to the auditorium. "Oh my God, Misato's here!" he heard Shinji exclaim from behind him. He felt glad for Shinji-kun. He was finally going to get support from the one family he had been given; He smiled in amusement as the blue-haired woman stumbled down the aisle to find a seat in the front, even if she _was_a little drunk. He turned back behind the curtains if the stage and smiled encouragingly at Shinji's nervous expression: An expression that soon turned to embarrassment as Shinji glimpsed Misato falling on her backside as she tried to sit down.

Soon the whole room was filled with people talking excitedly, both in the seating area, and behind the stage. People were running back and forth making last minute preparations. Asuka was lingering in front of the mirror fixing her hair and dress. The class rep, Hikari, sat in front of the grand piano, quickly rehearsing _her_piece for the concert. Everyone was busy. Two third years, a boy and a girl, spoke in eager voices as the lights started to dim and the audience quieted down. They were up first, it seemed. He leaned towards Shinji and the other two, Kensuke and Toji, "Get ready. We're up third." The three boys nodded determinedly.

The first performance was very good, Kaworu had to admit. The two third years had sung a duet version of _Santa Baby, _much to the crowd's amusement; especially when the boy sang. He even noticed Shinji laughing softly as the teens wiggled their eyebrows exaggeratingly at each other. When the song was over, the audience had burst in applause and whistles as the two walked offstage holding hands and laughing merrily.

Asuka was next and, Kaworu conceded, despite her rough attitude, her voice was very soft and melodic as she sang in German. She had arranged her hair in a loose French twist and wore gauzy red dress, a beaded rose pattern sewed all across the front of it. The redhead had walked onstage smiling, named the song she was going to sing, and started;

Es ist ein Ros' entsprungen  
Aus einer Wurzel zart.  
Wie uns die Alten sungen,  
Aus Jesse kam die Art  
Und hat ein Blümlein bracht,  
Mitten im kalten Winter,  
Wohl zu der halben Nacht.

Das Röslein das ich meine,  
Davon Jesaias sagt:  
Maria ist's, die Reine,  
Die uns das Blümlein bracht:  
Aus Gottes ewigem Rat  
Hat sie ein Kindlein g'boren  
Bleibend ein reine Magd. (1)

Her performance was received like the first. The audience applauded, some sending shouts of approval, while others whistled as she strode proudly off the stage. She held out her hand as she passed Shinji and Kaworu's group, "High five, Shinji!" she exclaimed, grinning wider when the younger boy complied, "You guys are up next. Good luck!"

"Thanks, Asuka," Shinji smiled as Toji slapped the loud girl heartily on the back, congratulating her on a performance well done.

Shinji still felt a little nervous as their cue came. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Kensuke smiling at him, "Come on, Shinji, let's go knock their socks off!"

"Yeah!" Toji cried, throwing up his fist in a show of _manly manliness_, "Let's show them who the best damn violinists, cellists, and whatever-the-hell-else-ists are!"

The blue-eyed boy turned to Kaworu, and relaxed when he saw the encouraging smile directed at him, "Alright, let's go."

* * *

_The Devil's Trill_ was originally a violin solo, but as Toji and Kensuke had insisted on all_four _of them to perform the song together, they had to adapt it to their four instruments. Of course, since Kaworu played the violin, he started first, slowly introducing the song to the crowd. Then Kensuke joined in with the piano, adding a background to the melody. Toji joined in soon after with the bass adding a heavy undertone. Finally, Shinji on the cello, added to the mix. He almost dropped his bow in embarrassment when Misato abruptly stood up, cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled, "GO, SHINJI! KNOCK'EM DEAD!" before sitting back down and ignoring the scattered bursts of laughter from behind her. He continued playing, though, when he heard the soft chuckles of his friends behind him even as they played.

Fortunately, for Shinji's sanity, the rest of their performance proceeded without any other interruptions. They were applauded heartily as they left the stage, and some people even stood up and repeated Misato's earlier statement.

Shinji groaned in mortification, "I'm going to _kill_Misato!" he cried. Toji and Kensuke just guffawed, while Kaworu tried to cover his chuckles with a pale hand. Shinji couldn't help but join in.

* * *

The Christmas Concert had been a huge success: a huge, exhausting, success. Shinji let himself slouch in his chair, sighing loudly. Almost everyone had left, only a few lingering performers and audience members walked and chatted with each around the seating area. Even the backstage had been deserted for hot cocoa and cookies in the entrance hall.

Shinji started slightly as mug of steaming liquid appeared in front of him. He looked up to a smiling Kaworu, and took the cup gratefully, blushing when Kaworu leaned his forehead against his.

"Did you have fun?" Kaworu asked softly.

"Yeah, it was great seeing everyone's performance" he replied, taking a sip of the hot chocolate in his cup. It was a little awkward, having the silver-haired teen so close to him and all. But it was comfortable nonetheless. He downed the rest of the chocolate from the cup.

"Do you like the hot cocoa?" Kaworu asked, smiling.

"Oh. Yes, thank you. I thought you had left already, though." He said, yawning slightly.

"I'm going to wait until you can leave with Katsuragi-san. My cousin is busy right now anyway." The red-eyed boy stated.

"Are you sure?" Shinji, asked, "I… don't want to keep you… too long." He replied between yawns.

"You can keep me for as long as you wish, Shinji"

"Huh?" the younger boy asked drowsily, " Can you repeat that?" his mouth gaped open in a silent yawn.

"I said, ' you look like a fish." Kaworu sniggered at the boy's slow reaction to the statement: a confused look, and then a slight blush." You can lean on my shoulder if you're tired, Shinji-kun."

"Hmm, thank you." Shinji murmured, shifting around to do so, eyes drifting shut slowly.

Kaworu smiled warmly and put an arm around the younger boy's shoulder. He began stroking Shinji's soft brown hair lightly, completely content with the situation in which he found himself.

"That feels nice, Kaworu." Shinji giggled sleepily, shifting closer to Kaworu.

Kaworu smiled, "Merry Christmas, Shinji-kun."

* * *

(1) Translation of Asuka's song:

Lo, how a rose e'er blooming  
From tender stem hath sprung!  
Of Jesse's lineage coming,  
As men of old have sung.  
It came, a flow' ret bright,  
Amid the cold of winter,  
When half-spent was the night.

Isaiah 'twas foretold it,  
The rose I have in mind,  
With Mary we behold it.  
The Virgin mother kind.  
To show God's love aright  
She bore to them a Savior,  
When half-spent was the night.

**A/N: Whew!! Finally done!! This took me 5 hours people! You all better review, cuz im about to fall dead of exhaustion and a bad case of brain melt!**


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